Shimmery Summer Skin in an Instant! (Hot Mommas Know)

I had the joy of having my make-up done at the Smashbox counter about a month back. I already had a crush on their cosmetics but their Body Lights Glowing Lotion is simply stunning--even on the palest complexion. I absolutely adore how it gives a tint of color and a little shine that really makes your skin glow beautifully. Plus the very light scent doesn't interfere with my perfume--but it smells nice enough you don't have to wear any scent other then it! Oh and don't be afraid to put this everywhere--a little goes a long way! It even is great for a little glow for your cheeks!

So I have not fallen off the face of the Earth

I have just been consumed with unpacking, cleaning, grocery shopping, damn reunion planning...Things that I would rather not be doing. I promise to have a new post up soon with pictures and everything from the SGRT. PROMISE. Oh and there will be pictures of me and my non-existent breasts in a bikini. You were warned.

xoxo
~Kd

Nothing Says Love Like Sharing Poop.

I have to post about poop. There is no getting around it. I have managed to go this long without actually devoting a post, but the last few days have made that completely unavoidable. So here it is. You were warned.

Poo Tale #1 Muirne
Monday afternoon, Muirne calls me frantically from the bathroom,

"Mommy!! Mommy!!!! Come look at this QUICK!!!!!"

Me, thinking the toilet overflowed, or Bardolf had peed on the floor, or God forbid a SPIDER is in there, I rush to the bathroom. Once in there, I see Muirne sitting on the toilet, doing her business and I don't see what the issue is, so I say,

"What's the matter?!"

Muirne leans forward, exposing her poo in the toilet and says,

"LOOK Mommy! Look how BIG it is! Isn't it HUGE?!"

Yep she called me in to admire the poo of the century. Awesome.

Poo Tale #2 My In-laws' Dog
We had Muirne's birthday party on Sunday and my in-laws came from up north and stayed the weekend with us. They had to bring their dog, because she is getting older and has to be let out frequently because she just can't hold it anymore. Things are going fine up until right before the party starts. All of a sudden their dog is running across my living room carpet leaving a trail of poo behind her. I guess she didn't want to forget her way back to her food bowl.

Poo Tale #3 Lizzard

Lizzard has a kennel that she is put into when we have to run errand or go anywhere that we can't take her. Mostly she is in there for a short time, but it never seems to fail that she needs to use the bathroom and even though I have been told repeatedly that dogs will not poo or urinate in "their area" she does. Every. Time. She. Is. In. It. Well not poo every time, but pee. It's weird, and gross. She isn't worked up or anything so I don't think it is an anxiety issue. I think she is just Mental. But I think my other posts about her have already proven that.

Poo Tale #4 Bardolf and Lizzard
Bardolf has been potty-trained through the night for about six months now. Considering he is a) a boy and b) not three until the middle of December, this is a pretty big feat (or so I have been told by countless mothers of boys, I had a girl first so I don't know anything). For the past week or so he has been WAY too distracted with, oh who knows, being a boy, that going potty in the toilet is not a priority. This has been only happening with pee until the other night. He was in the bathroom when suddenly he starts calling for us to come in there. Caspian goes in and starts yelling for me. When I get into the bathroom, Caspian is holding Lizzard with their backs to me. Bardolf is standing with his pants down next to the toilet and there is a large smear of poo on the floor.


Caspian looks at me while turning Lizzard around to face me. I can see poo on her face.
"Lizzard was eating Bardolf's poop," he says.

With that I end my Poo Tales of Squirrelly-ville from the last few days. You're Welcome.

Reunion Recap: the Good, the Gorgeous and the Gay

Okay so I know you are all waiting with baited breath for stories about the reunion. Honestly it was pretty uneventful with the classmates being the same with the exception of kids (well some had kids in high school), spouses (well some had spouses in high school), jobs (well lots had jobs in high school), and tattoos (well some had those in high school too). Catch my drift?

There were however some changes. Our ASB president and one of our most lusted after athletes is now a successful hairdresser and teaches dance with his male life partner when he is not making several of my former classmates fabulous. That changed, but he is still one of the nicest guys I know.

The "outcasts" were seemingly normal, functioning and might I add pleasant to look at where in the past they wore black boots and sneers, instead wore black dresses and perfectly pink pouts.

Almost all attending were friendly and fun, though mostly staying with their familiar groups some mingling between them did occur. My most entertaining people watching of the night occurred between those who in high school never crossed each other's paths.

I found myself floating between groups and tables, much like I did in high school. Some conversations still haunted by the insecurities of the past and others met with a confidence of the present. Mostly I felt at peace with the person I have become and the woman I was able to present myself as.

The night did have a couple hitches, though minor, however I went in deciding that you can't make everyone happy all the time and I would do my best to enjoy my night no matter what. I did.

Oh and the very best part of the reunion? Knowing that I looked great, and being told so. Granted I didn't do much with myself as a teen. My wardrobe consisted of jeans, sweatshirts and ponytails with mascara and blush at best. Still the knowing that after 10 years, 7 as a wife, and 6 as a mother I have improved my looks really made me feel great. It seems silly and shallow, but dammit I am proud of that.

The reunion was a good thing. I am so glad that I went and even though it was a huge undertaking I am glad I planned it too (with LOTS of help). After seeing the past, knowing how it was and knowing where I am now I am proud of the person I have become, and no one there can make me feel differently. Will I go to another reunion? Absolutely. Will I plan another reunion? Absolutely not. ;P



PS: I know that I said there would be pictures. There will be as soon as I can get copies from my friends. My camera battery died (I know I was not a happy camper) so I am waiting on others for pictures from the night. I looked FAB. Seriously.

Can You Have A Six-Pack With Stretch Marks?

I ask this as I am pondering the commitment I have made not only to myself, but to the dear Mrs. G and all those that frequent Derfwad Manor in the hopes of joining her retirement retreat Women's Colony. Maybe I am not alone and I can serve as some inspiration as Mrs. G as been to me!

I stare at my once smooth, tight and ridiculously perfect "abs" which have now turned to nothing more then a bumpy mess of scar tissue and flab. I wonder if the combined weight gain of 90+ pounds and the three surgeries all done with at least one incision through my once pronounced "outie" belly could ever show some semblance of the body I once knew. The words of my surgeon echoing through my head that the only course of action to rectify the "damage" of babies and surgeries was yet even more surgery.

What if it isn't just "damage"? What if seeing the muscles tone and define under the scars is the real course of action? What if there were more like me willing to show what has been the perfect environment for babies to grow, develop and thrive? That beneath the scarred and soft exterior is the strong, perfect body that we once had, not the same but improved to a point of being a more perfect example of what the female body is capable of.

This is my commitment to myself to not be discouraged by what I see, but instead to be proud of what I have accomplished and what I can do to further thank my body for all it has done. So I offer a picture. One that I will post weekly to not only hold me accountable, but to show the progress of a body being accepted and challenged. This is when it all changes!

KD Stretchie Stomach week 2 (I weenied out week one for the picture):

"As You Wish" Auds!

Auds at Barking Mad tagged me for this meme and I being the total procrastinator I am (except when it comes to spending time with my lover) have finally gotten around to it. So in case you wanted to know some random Crap about me, here it is:



What is your favorite quotable line from a movie?



"As You Wish." Princess Bride the BEST MOVIE EVAH!



I can't tell you how badly I wanted Cary Elwes to say that to me instead of what's her face. Instead when I was being particularly demanding and for lack of better words a complete spoiled shit, my dad repeated to me that quote.

Who is the most famous person you've talked to?



I used to wait tables at a nice restaurant in the Airport so if taking an order and asking "Chardonnay or Merlot" counts as talking to someone famous then I have done it a few times. My favorite Golf celebrity that I waited on was Peter Jacobsen. He and his wife are really wonderful people, plus I *heart* golf and loved going to the "Peter's Party" tournament that he used to host.

How many bags/boxes of potato chips are consumed at your house per month?



Caspian takes the snack sized bags to work so probably about 20 bags by him. The rest of the time we eat tortilla chips and guacamole.

What foreign food dish do you prepare from scratch and serve?



Nothing. I am not a cook. I do make an AWESOME strawberry shortcake from scratch though!

What is your favorite section of the supermarket?



The coffee section. Seriously there are three different brands of whole bean coffee dispensers with at least twenty kinds of bean per brand, plus half an aisle of other coffee and teas. SO COOL! That and Bulk foods. I like all the neat little bins. Makes me want to be all domestic and cook from scratch even though I don't.

What was your high school team's mascot and what were the school colors?



The Raiders. Like Pirates. ARRGGG! The only problem is that we are on the West Coast and I being from the NW am a HUGE Seahawks fan and the Oakland Raiders are a huge rival of the Seahawks. See my dilemma? Our colors were green, black and silver.

Okay so now I am supposed to tag some other peeps so here ya go!

1. Pajama_Momma @ Does this Blog Make mY Butt Look Big
2. Jennifer @ Dust Bummy Hostage
3. Happy Hippy Raindancer @ Tiny Little Bits and Peices

Bardolf: Fearless Boy Wonder (MMLM)

Bardolf has no fear. It scares the crap out of me--yet at the same time his complete disregard for what he should fear makes me laugh out loud!

For more giggles visit:

SGRT Day 4: Highways 1, KD 0

Okay so umm I am blogging in the middle of North Central Washington on Dial-up. 'Nuff said. Luckily for me I have our good friend Jose hangin' with me and keeping me company in my Cell Phone Flask (thanks Queen). Okay so it's no really that bad..just almost.

Have I stated yet that I hate road trips? I haven't? Okay I HATE ROAD TRIPS!! I hate everything about them. The driving, the riding, the whining, the peeing, the packing, EVERYTHING. I know I said I was trying to keep it positive like this kid but ya know I can only be so kind for so long. So far we have driven more then half of our miles and then some. Don't get me wrong--the scenery is unbelievable and there will be pictures! The beach at Deception pass was perfect, no one has thrown up in the car and we still have all our wheels on the 'burb.

However Caspian and I have a cold, Bardolf has lost bladder control in the car (ONLY in the car--the rest of the time he is fine), Muirne is a complete DVD junkie, and Lizzard has discovered that today is Garbage Day at Great-Papa's house. AWESOME. Oh not to mention that I have had a KILLER headache the entire trip.

Okay, okay so I know that those things aren't awful, really, but being that the mere thought of spending ANOTHER minute in the car is giving me hives I cannot be held responsible for my actions today. Caspian keeps coming and and buggin' me as I type to see "What the Plan" is today. Umm as of right now, MY plan is to drink coffee, finish my blog post and respond to comments. I would love to read some of my favorite blogs today, but being he is hovering like an annoying mosquito ready to SUCK MY LIFE BLOOD at any minute should I show signs of consciousness, that is probably a no-go.

If you have been following my Tweets I can promise you from here on out they will be mostly negative and sarcastic, I mean more so then they have been so far. I can also promise you that there will be cursing and I don't mean My Go-To Word. You have been warned.

Not that we are all that interesting..

But hey I guess just as much as the next family in suburbia!

Those coming in will most likely already know us but in case you don't here is a quick run-down:

I am a Stay at Home mom of two listed on the sidebar:

"Muirne" is the older of the two. A red-headed firecracker of a five year old with the attitude to match.

"Bardolf" is a blond angelic-looking little boy. Don't let his looks fool you!

"Caspian" is the man behind the curtain running the show but not in the spotlight.

"Lizzard the terrorist" is the furry fury of the group, an adopted Wire-hair Fox Terrier who joined our faily last October. She is the chaser of squirrels jumper of fences and the fearer of garbage trucks.

All in all this squirrelly gang with the guest members make up our life. May our sanity stay intact!

News May Come Sooner Then Expected**Updated

Caspian called to tell me that we should hear some sort of decision on the positions open in the company by mid-week next week. Even as early as Tuesday. As strange as it may sound, we are hoping to get passed by this round. Two of the positions being picked will open up two more that we are really looking forward to. We hope being passed up next week will put Caspian in a greater position for an excellent promotion. Any of you that can spare a moment to think of us, thank you. If we do have to move it would be ideal that it happen over the holiday break from school, though there is a huge, wonderful possibility we don't have to move at all.

Thanks so much for thinking of us!

xoxo,


**Update: Caspian called again and one more position will be filled that will open up another! We REALLY are hoping now to be passed by this round! Three awesome positions will be open if we are able to dodge these! Yea!!

You Know How There Are Like The Longest Weeks Ever?

Well this is one of them.

Caspian is waiting on yet more news of possible promotion. He is an assistant manager now and we have been waiting nearly three years for his promotion. Now before you are all like what the hell is wrong with him that he has had to wait three years, let me just say that there were circumstances (his bosses got shuffled, then one of his bosses did something bad and then his boss that did something bad almost left the company....blah blah blah) that had nothing to do with Caspian but directly affected him, so his promotion had to wait.

Well once all of that crap was cleared up, Caspian could start putting in for promotions. His company kind of does it weird to where you have to apply to be on "The List" for manager, then you "Run" for stores. In a way it is really cool because everyone gets the same chance to apply for anything that comes open. On the other hand, it means WAITING for them to make a decision on each store, which you have about a one in twenty chance of getting.

So you can see my dilemma.

The most recent opening would mean a move. This move would mean being split right between our families geographically, which would be pretty awesome and sad at the same time. Right now we are close to all my family, but that means being about 2-3 hours from Caspian's parents. In spite of moving away from my family we are VERY excited about this opportunity. It would mean buying a house for the first time. We have held off buying because we have always moved with every job change and now with the market being in the toilet for selling we are so glad we waited.

So nutty readers, keep us in your thoughts. We sure can use them this week! FRIDAY COME FAST!!

Oh and I promise a really Nut-a-licious post soon. Today, however I am just too distracted.

I almost forgot my head, but luckily it's attached.

The juveniles have swim classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Bardolf's class is 4:30-5pm then we break for an hour and come back for Muirne's class from 6-6:30pm. I put their swim bag in the locker room before Bardolf's class and leave it there until Muirne is finished with hers. Just one less thing to haul around that we don't have to. Well last week Caspian went to class with us. We watched Bardolf, headed out for an hour, then came back for Muirne's. While we were headed back in I stop and look at Caspian.

KD: "Will you grab their swim backpack?"
Caspian: "I don't see it."
KD: " It must be in the back, or maybe between the seats."
Caspian: "It isn't in here."
KD sighing: "Yes it is, you just aren't looking! Let me look."
....
KD: "CRAP! I must have taken it inside when we went home! Can you go home and get it? Geesh!"
Caspian, shaking his head: "Be right back."
....
KD turning quickly: "CASPIAN STOP!!"
Caspian: "Huh..."
KD sheepishly: "I forgot I left it in the Locker Room like I always do..."
Caspian: "Sometimes I wonder how you make it through the day."

Penis Envy

You know size really doesn't matter. So they say. However if you happen upon my bedroom and you hear the shower running and two people having a conversation don't be surprised what you hear.

Caspian: Hey you want to jump in the shower real quick so we can go to dinner?

Bardolf (Who did you think it was going to be? You pervs): OOO can I take shower wid you Da-a-ee??

Caspian: Sure buddy, lets hurry though so we can get to dinner.

Bardolf: Okay. Da-ee?

Caspian: Yes Buddy?

Bardolf: When I get Big do my Penie get big like you?

Caspian: Uh....

KD: Yep your penie get real big, bigger then Daddy! (*snort*)

Bardolf: COOL!!

Tattoos--there is a reason that tough bikers get them..

...and I probably shouldn't.

I have a tattoo (well actually two, but one is a cover-up of my first--don't EVER get matching tattoos) and I don't remember it being that awful other then mostly annoying then kinda numb. I also must point out that it is all filled in black, about the size of a dollar bill and on my left shoulder blade. Not a horrible place to get one, but not the most comfortable either.

Anyhoo, for quite some time (years people) I have wanted to get my feet tattooed, something for the kids but I wasn't sure what. The tattoo on my back is a hibiscus (my favorite flower) and so I got the idea that I would get some hibiscus flowers on my feet. One on the left with the initial "M" for Muirne, who is left handed. One on the right with the initial "B" for Bardolf who is favoring his right hand.

So after toying with the idea of getting it done somewhat soon, I realized that this weekend would be the perfect opportunity since the Juveniles went up to my in-laws for the weekend this morning. I will have two and a half days to heal a bit before they come home.

So I call my dear Rhi-bananan for moral support and I make an appointment after a consult to have my tattoos done today at two. Well I finally got in about 2:45 which had given me ample time to FREAK THE HELL OUT about getting my feet tattooed. The artists name was Matt and he was really fabulous. He took his time and positioned and repositioned the designs he had made and got to it after asking me this:

"Any questions before I start?"

I had a couple questions, mostly how bad will this hurt and could I run down the street to the mini-mart for a case of beer first. Pretty much having the tops of my feet tattooed was more painful then childbirth. Okay maybe not that bad but I think handing out shots at tattoo parlors should be mandatory. Jut sayin'.

I am truly pleased with the outcome. Here is a peak:

Before:



After:

Squirrelly Gang Road Trek 2008--Alcoholic Beverages Mandatory.

If you happen to be in the state of Washington over the next week and see a big white Suburban with this sticker on it:

and a woman in the front passenger seat sipping on a flask and that would be me. We are embarking on a 958 mile trek covering many areas of the state starting the 12th and not returning until the 19th, visiting family and friends of Caspian's. Take note that I did not say family and friends of OURS. He so owes me.

The entire Squirrelly Gang will be in the Suburban for the duration with the occasional extra passengers. At least it will make good blogging material. Thankfully there will be alcohol at every stop. Think of me my dears...Oh and I will also be annoying the crap out of you all with tweets and twipics, as well as blogging at various stops when I can! Stay tuned!

PS: To anyone who knows us or has figured out where we live, just because we are gone don't think you can get away with stealing my flowers or Caspian's car. My neighbor is a police officer, my other neighbor is retired special forces military, now working for the county jail, and his wife is Vietnamese, 'nuff said.

Thankful Thursdays: Goofy Gratitude

This week I wanted to show gratitude for some not so serious things, but things I am thankful for nonetheless!

• I am thankful for the AWESOME hair I have been having this week. Like seriously! Even first thing in the morning. That has never happened ever. It's pretty cool.
  
• For the piles of leaves perfect for jumping into!
  
• For Lizzard's boundless energy that has been a source of constant entertainment this week. She has no shame that Mental Dog!
  
• For coffee and creamer...My family is thankful I have those too!
  
• For wine...Which is another thing my family is thankful I have!
  
• I am totally thankful for punctuation!! Especially exclamation points which I totally overuse!!!!
  
• For Blogger in Draft because I have been able to add some new stuff and I can do this!YESSSS STRIKETHROUGH PEOPLE! Blogger in Draft...thank you.
  
• For my nutty readers who even though may think the squirrels really have stolen my sanity continue to humor me by reading and commenting anyway!

So what are you thankful for this week Nutty Readers?

What are you Grateful for? (Bloggy Carnival)

Thankful Thursdays are the highlight of my week. I love sharing all my squirrel-rific posts with you, but etching out that day once a week to really highlight the things in like I am grateful for brings me back to center and reminds me of the important things in life (no matter how small I am thankful for all). On my last post Auds suggested that I make it into a weekly Bloggy Carnival and invite others to share with some help from Mister Linky. Well I had actually been thinking of doing just that!

So join me Thursday and be ready to link up your own Thankful Thursday post! Feel free to grab the Thankful Thursday picture to use as well! I can't wait to enjoy the good vibrations and attitudes of gratitude that this will bring within the blogosphere! See you Thursday!

Bardolf's First Baseball Game!

We had my nephew's B-day party Friday at the local minor league park. It was Bardolf's first professional game so of course we took picts!

"NO YOU SHARE DAT WAT-R GUN"

Yesterday afternoon we went to the local spray park to cool off and let off steam as temperatures here have finally decided to be summer-like and then some. Bardolf had a short , late nap so the fun was compounded by the fact that he was in short, Cranky.

Muirne jumped right in and started running through the water. Bardolf, on the other hand, was not his usual Fearless Boy Wonder and instead paced around the outside watching the water gun/canons that were being utilized by some boys that had got to them first.

To say Bardolf was agitated by the fact that he not only had to wait his turn, but the other boys were not exactly excited to share is an understatement. He paced and cried and yelled about wanting to use the guns. I told him that he would have to wait his turn. So he did. Then he was in heaven, until he had to give up his turn so someone else could have a turn.

As you can imagine the concept of taking turns at two-and-a-half is as best sporadically understood. He was extremely distraught and continued to fixate on his desire for the guns. This got old, so we took a break, had a snack and enjoyed the comical view.

Last night Bardolf started to cry out in his sleep. I could tell he was dreaming so I listened intently to see if he needed me to come in or if he would drift off again. All of a sudden I overheard this:

Bardolf: "NO! NO, dat MY TURN! You give me wat-r gun!! NO! YOU SHARE DAT WAT-R GUN!!"

Yep even strung-out about it in his dreams....

Because this post would be incomplete without them--some pictures:

Yeah, So you know that whole Stretchie-to-Six-Pack Thing?

Oh you don't remember? Yeah me neither, until now. I have been a total slacker occupied by fixing accidental Stumbles with P*rn Tags obligations and have not been taking my Stretchie-to-Six-Pack 5K Ass Challenge seriously. Mrs. G. I humbly ask for your forgiveness for my crappiness as a 5K Ass Challenge participant.

Well that all changes now! The next couple Wednesdays I will have guest posts from two fabulous fitness Bloggers. Yoga Grrl and Mark Salinas, MN. Seriously these two rock my socks and have graciously after my threat of stalking agreed to help my nutty self and you nutty readers to get a firmer flatter tummy and maybe a kickin' ass. So stay tuned for some Squirrel-rific tips and tricks starting next Wednesday!

PS: I have lost about 3lbs since this picture was taken, but I need to tone BADLY!

BYOB or Wine, or Booze us Squirrelly Dwellers aren't picky!

Auds over at Casa Barking Mad invited me to a Cyber Dinner Party. This Nutty Readers, is an invitation that I received quite some time ago and in all my SUCKTASTIC-NESS I am just getting around to writing my list. I am supposed to invite 10 bloggy friends to invite, but since I am new I am only inviting a small handful. I know Auds, I SUCK! I am trying M'Kay?

So in no particular order I invite the following bloggers whom I have grown to adore (oh if you have already been invited then GO YOU and consider it a double invite):

• Alias Mother Who works, pumps, and keeps it real. I dig her honest writing. Makes me feel like I am sitting chatting with someone over coffee.
• Creative Momma She is CLASSY. You can just tell. She always has a kind post and makes me want to be more creative. BONUS: Her daughter is the CUTEST and she posts pictures of the cuteness often
• Does this Blog Make My Butt Look Big All I can say is she makes me laugh and I totally think we may have been separated at birth. She gets me and I like her.
• Mamasphere Anyone that can go to church and come out not necessarily moved by the spirit, but moved by an accent is someone that I need to hang with.

Okay so my list is short. I like many, many more, but I do know that some have already been invited and I need to get this list posted before Auds kicks my ass.

xoxo

-KD

Six

You were a surprise. I was not ready. Your daddy had been ready for years.

You already had your blue eyes and red hair programmed in. I had no idea what I was in for. Your daddy was all in regardless.

You came into this world 8lbs 1oz and with your first breath, screaming. I didn't know what breathing really was until you. Your daddy breathes because of you.

You were ready to embrace and explore everything. I wanted only to hold you. Your daddy held us both.

You showed me love unconditionally and perfect friendship. I want to live to be your love and friend. Your daddy is the best love and friend for us both.

You offered patience and compassion to your brother. I learned to love another through you. Your daddy let his heart swell with the love of his complete family.

You turn six today. My surprise love and friend for all time.

Happy Birthday Snuggle. I love you.

When All Hope Was Lost...

I had become disenchanted with all others. Years of disappointment, broken promises and incompetence had left me feeling that there could never be one to satisfy my wants, desires, needs, and obsessions.

After being let down once again by my last after years of trying to make excuses for the shortcomings and the heartache, I vowed never again to settle for second best. That the next time it would be different. I would get what I deserved and I would expect only the best.

Urged by my friends and family to quit selling myself short, I decided that today was the day. Today things would be different. Today I would find my one true love. A love that would embrace my obsessions, never falter and not only live up to expectations but surpass them.

Today I found True Love.

The Juveniles share that love.

Karate Chopping the Wizard of Oz in the Nova

It's just Bardolf and me in the house.

Muirne stayed at Grammie's last night. Grammie's husband 'T' is away on business so they had a girl's night in. A girl's night that preceded with swimming in the pool at Grammie's condo and ended with Dib's bite-sized ice cream watchin Karate Dog and The Wizard of Oz.

Muirne is in yellow brick road-Karate chopping heaven.

Bardolf is in sissy-less stuck with mommy hell.

Thank goodness I kept the big guns under wraps until the proper moment of action. Muirne and Grammie snuck off to her house while Bardolf napped to avoid meltdown of the year 2008. Bardolf woke just as they pulled away. This is what followed:

B: Wh-wh-wh-wh-Where Sissy go? Wh-wh-wh-wh-where GRAMMIE GO? I WANNA GO GRAMMIE HOUSE!!

KD: Bardolf, want to go for a ride? We'll go to the Post Office and see daddy at work!

B (On the verge of tears and total meltdown): I-I-I-I-I NO WAN GO SEE DADDY! I-I-I-I-I WAN GO GRAMMIE HOUSE!!

KD: Want to ride in daddy's car?

B (*SNIFF* then big grin): o-o-o-OKAY!

KD: Good, let's have a snack and then go.

B: I-I-I-I-I WANNA DIVE (drive)!

KD: **sigh**

In Case You Weren't Convinced I Am A Total Freak

MommyPie tagged me for a 10 Random Things Meme and because I suck I have just now gotten around to it. So without further ado I now will make you wonder why you read the blog of such a freak.

1. I am really weird about my feet. This may come as a surprise since I recently had them tattooed, but I really hate having my feet touched and/or touching anyone else's feet. It literally makes me gag. Even having to touch my own children's feet freaks me out. I even have issues about walking on certain surfaces because of how they feel.
2. Suede icks me out. I don't like how it feels. I will not touch anyone wearing it. I will not buy suede shoes. I don't even like micro suede furniture.
3. I have texture issues. Food, clothing furniture, etc. I am really picky about how things feel. I got a silk shirt for Christmas one year and I refused to wear it because it was that soft fuzzy silk.
4. I was a drama/choir nerd. I was in several community, school and church plays from the age of three up to 17. I also sang in multiple choirs. I still sing daily to my favorite audience aka the juveniles. They think I rock out loud, and so do I.
5. I am very OCD about vacuuming and cleaning EXCEPT when it comes to showers and my bathroom (not the guest bath, just mine). I HATE HATE HATE cleaning my bathroom and shower. I really don't know why.
6. My dad has called me KD-PIE for as long as I can remember. I used to have personalized plates that read that. I still have the plates and want to have them made into a purse.
7. I golf and used to do it competitively in High School. I am not like Pro good, but I can hold my own on a course, especially if I have had a couple beers.
8. I love the Coast but hate the sand. I really hate sand in my shoes and on my feet if it is dry. Wet sand is okay.
9. I love vampire movies, but not horror movies in general. I really want to be Buffy and if the head vampire from Fright Night wanted to seduce me I am all for it. Vampires freak me out, but I seriously love them anyway.
10. I don't like bunny stuff. Stuffed bunnies, pictures of bunnies, bunnies on clothes, figurines, none of it. Muirne however has a favorite blanket she calls "Boosh" and it has an embroidered bunny on it. Bunny stuff makes me want to scratch out my eyeballs. Yet I like real rabbits.

Okay so if you are still with me after that you are as much of a messed up freak as I am. Some of the really crazy crap I left out because it just makes me look even more insane and honestly I need all three of my readers.

His Peenie is BIG like Dis!

The other day Bardolf walked in as I went to the bathroom (okay this could be any day of the week as I haven't gone to the bathroom alone since Muirne was born). He has a bit of a thoughtful look on his face and asked, "Mommy, how come you no hold your peenie when you go potty?"

I chuckled and said, "I don't have a peenie, brother, only boys have peenies and I am a girl."

He thought for a moment, smiled and said, "I a boy an' daddy a boy! I have peenie! So does daddy!! His peenie is BIG like dis:"
Daddy must be so proud.



(I can't make this stuff up people. He kills me. I asked him to show me how big daddy's peenie was when I took this picture, because just describing it doesn't do the story justice.)